Opinions

Fri
01
Dec

The Right Tool For The Job

by Baxter Black

Clark owned a small dairy farm in Delaware. Thinking to add to his larder, he bought a black steer at Dill’s auction down the road to fatten a beef for the family. He put the steer in a grazing pasture with the dairy heifers. In a short time he noticed that the steer was trying to breed the heifers! Not a good thing on a dairy farm. He decided to take him back to the sale the next week, in the meantime he needed to separate him from the heifers.

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Fri
01
Dec

COP KILLER FACES EXECUTION WITH A SMILE

by Bartee Haile

A minute before midnight on Nov. 29, 1930, the condemned cop killer finished a letter to his widow-to-be, glanced at the nervous chaplain and asked with a wry smile, “What return address shall I put on this?”

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Wed
22
Nov

ACTOR’S HIT-MAN FATHER MURDERED FEDERAL JUDGE

By Bartee Haile

Minutes after the fatal shooting of President Kennedy on Nov. 22, 1963, Dallas police found a trio of unusually well-dressed tramps in a boxcar behind the “grassy knoll” and marched them single-file through Dealey Plaza.

Photographers snapped several pictures of the passing parade. In the ensuing years, the youngest and tallest of the three was identified by assorted laymen and at least one forensic expert as Charles Voyde Harrelson, a notorious killer-for-hire and father of popular actor Woody Harrelson.

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Wed
22
Nov

Thanksgiving

By Baxter Black

It’s Thanksgiving here in the U.S.A. Canada had theirs in October. Good neighbors, we are. It is something both countries can be thankful for. Either one of us could have moved in, only to find North Korea or Syria lived next door.

Our countries are blessed. North America’s a pretty good neighborhood. We have big backyards full of timber, pasture, minerals and oil. We have flowerbeds with fertile soil growing corn and rice and peaches.

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Fri
17
Nov

BOWIE GOES LOOKING FOR SILVER AND FINDS INDIANS

By Bartee Haile

Jim Bowie went looking for underground riches in 1831 but found instead a bunch of belligerent Indians on Nov. 20.

“The Lost Bowie Mine” was not always lost nor was it always named after the famous frontiersman. In 1753 Spaniards searching for a place to put a mission in present-day Llano County learned of a cedro de almagre or hill of red ocher. Several explorers were shown the mineral-rich mound by obliging Apaches.

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Fri
17
Nov

Cold Feet

By Baxter Black

Yer lookin’ at a feller with no tennis shoes, a ’76 GMC pickup, an outhouse and a learning permit for a cell phone. But! Lest you lump me into that group of stodgy ol’ dinosaurs that cling to the days of Garth Brooks, pygmy Angus, and real spare tires...Let me assure you that I have stepped boldly into the modern world of manly footwear.

A constant recurring memory of workin’ cows when I first started years ago was cold feet. Everybody wore their regular regulation cowboy boots with five-buckle overshoes. And everybody’s feet got cold.

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Fri
10
Nov

HOUSTON’S “HARD TO GET” STRATEGY WORKS WITH WASHINGTON

by Bartee Haile

Concerned over Texas’ increasingly cozy relationship with the British, the U.S. Secretary of State informed the Lone Star minister on Nov. 10, 1843 that Washington was ready to reopen annexation talks.

Instead of telling Abel P. Upshur that it was about time, Isaac Van Zandt played it cool by simply saying he would see if his president was interested. Reading over the diplomat’s report a few days later, Sam Houston smiled at his success in shaking up his complacent former countrymen.

Fri
10
Nov

Moose Alert

Many of the animals rights groups give awards to citizens who perform good deeds on behalf of animals. These deeds are usually along the line of rescuing mistreated horses, homeless cats or HBC dogs (hit by car). Rarely do any cowboys receive an award. I would like to nominate Andy for his daring moose rescue last fall.

Andy was still trainin’ on Gracie as they rode across the high mountain pasture in the Uintas. He had named her Gracie with the same inversely convoluted reasoning with which U.S. senators refer to each other as “My distinguished colleague...”

 

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Fri
03
Nov

LT. GOVERNOR NOT MUCH OF A SHORTCUT

By Bartee Haile

T. Whitfield Davidson was elected lieutenant governor on Nov. 7, 1922, but the second highest office in the Lone Star State turned out not to be a short-cut to the top rung on the political ladder.

The twenty-eighth lieutenant governor of Texas has a lot of company in the history books. Of the 44 men who have held the Number Two job in the state government, only a baker’s dozen spent even a day as governor.

In the beginning, the junior governorship looked like a surefire steppingstone. Although all did not follow the same path, five of the first seven lieutenants reached the summit. James Pinckney Henderson had been in charge of the newly annexed Republic just three months, when he took a leave of absence to lead Texas troops in the war with Mexico. His second-in-command, Albert C. Horton, kept the home fires burning for six months until the warrior governor returned, and never again sought public office.

 

Fri
03
Nov

The Supersalesman

Slicker’n deer guts on a doorstep! Smooth as a filly’s nose! Here in this jug’s a miracle drug So new that nobody knows!

Feed it, inject it or plant it, Stick it under an ear. Pick any breed, results guaranteed.

 

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